What song describes you best
"'Things That Make You Go Hmmm...' by C&C Music Factory. Self-explanatory, innit?"
What is heaven?
"Being up there, having it."
What is hell?
"Being down there, hating it."
What's your earliest memory?
"Sticking a kirby grip into a socketwhen I was three. I got thrown across the room. I got told not to do it repeatedly, so I had to!"
What's your greatest fear?
"Eternal life. You wouldn't want to be alive forever, would you?"
Who is your all-time hero?
"My mum, because she doesn't take any shit from anybody. I wanna be like that."
What's the worst trouble you've been in?
"Probably being cought looking at a boy's bits when I was seven. We were checking each other's bits out and we got cought by his mum. His name was Michael. I don't really remember if they were nice bits."
Who was the first love of your life?
"Donny Osmond. I had a life-sized poster of him which was bigger than me. I was four or five. I probably kissed it."
What is your greatest talent?
"Playing the spoons. I taught myself at an early age. And I can wiggle my ears."
Can you read music?
"Very basic music."
Upon whom would you most like to exact revenge?
"I don't believe in revenge. I think people get what they deserve in life, and what goes around comes around. I know it's really hippyish. I used to think revenge was quite a good motivating factor, I don't anymore."
What can you cook?
"I can make quite a mean gazpacho. I'm good at pasta and rice. I was a veggie for 15 years; you have to be able to cook."
What's your most treasured possession?
"My cat, Benjamin Frischmann. I've had him since I was ten. He's incredibly healthy and determined. He gives me unconditional love."
What have you most regretted doing while drunk?
"Taking my clothes off in front of other people. Isn't that what most girls regret?"
What's the best piece of advice you've received?
"There's nothing that rhymes with month, silver or orange. So don't even go there."
If you were invisible for a day, what would you do?
"I'd go around and smell the napes of the famous. The napes of their necks. I have a bit of a nape thing."
What would your final three wishes be?
"It's got to be sex, drugs and money. In that order. Not rock'n'roll. Fuck rock'n'roll."